i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
