but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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