worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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