Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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