Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
