She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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