How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
