white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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