I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
