I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
