Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
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