I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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