VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
