my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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