we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
