My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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