We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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