Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I need moral support for this bender
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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