Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
