i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
ttyl tear gas
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
