I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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