I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
please come you make the beer taste better
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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