I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
