Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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