That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
