This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
