Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize