Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize