I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
a search helicopter?!
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Randomize
