I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
