..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
