Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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