You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
