we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
