did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
