I should be sponsored by Trojan
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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