she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
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