How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
