allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
