Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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