it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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