note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Boobs speak an international language.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
We don't watch enough power rangers
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
