im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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