Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I love having hate sex.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
