Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize