chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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