you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Randomize
