Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Randomize