My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
