Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I just sucked dick on a ferry
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
