i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize