none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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